by Douglas Messerli
Bernadette Mayer Eruditio
ex Memoria (New York: Angel Hair Books, 1977)
Does Mayer know
anatomies? Perhaps not. The impulse here seems to come as much from her
obsession with memory, from a compulsion towards autobiography that is related
to the confession such as Saint Augustine’s. But for Mayer memory is never an
end in itself. It is not memory past that most interests her, but memory
continuing, repeating, memory in the present made new through language in
Pound’s sense of that concept. Mayer’s art is not a seeking for what was but
what is, and how what is was made by that past. Mayer’s memory
is not nostalgic—as in Proust—but is a past that makes the new, makes possible
the new: an ending that is a beginning (“Each end is a beginning”). She seeks
not for old structures, not for a recreation
but for a decreation: “I put these
words on paper because they were once written by me, no, I too yearn for a
world without meaning.” As she previously wrote in her fiction Memory, “A whole new language is a
temptation.”
But Mayer’s
world, the world she discovers, is not without meaning. The past decreated gives rise to a new created or
recreated world. As with Adam, Mayer
calls things into meaning by naming. Through memory’s order “Hemispheres become
loose in the country, there are new forms.”
Is this different
from a Surrealist allowing the subconscious to create new structures, using
dream images as the basis for a new reality? Yes. Mayer’s past is not a dream,
not archetypal, not mythical, but a socially lived experience. These are school
notes, a pre-existent text rewritten (?) or almost intact, a life wrenched out
of chronological context not by chance but by fact, a life perhaps not experienced as discontinuous but was
(and because was can only be is in
memory), is in fact.
No coy
discontinuity is this, no clever dissociations. Actually, there is an attempt
in Eruditio at lucidness, to see
through the veil of experience to a
reality of flux, of life, of duration. And in this there is a basic recognition
of the ineffectuality, of the destructiveness of the written word as opposed to
spoken language. “There’s no use writing down Greek words if no one is going to
know what I’m saying.” Mayer is always after language, then, after the reality
that is language. Eruditio is a
search for that reality not as written word but as language, which as a thought
process is the thing itself. Saying
is thinking is perceiving is knowing. In fact, although this work may often
seem ineffable, there is throughout a drive for an absolute clarity of
language: “Add up a column of numbers, it comes to William Carlos Williams.”
All of which
brings us back to the genre of the anatomy, which comes from the Greek anatomé, a cutting up, an analysis or
minute examination, to show or examine the position, structure, and relation of
the parts. That is what this book is to me; it is an attempt to explain, to
demonstrate, to show how Mayer has come to know whatever it is she has come to
know. And in that sense, this book is a sharing, a removal of the veil, an
admission, an apology, a true confession.
In doing so,
moreover, it is itself a sign, an image, an emblem of language which stands for
Mayer and the world she has recreated,
an emblem like the red letter Hester Prynne wears. Eruditio ex Memoria ends with such an image: “In a painting I am a
Chinese woman turning away from a bowl of fruit.” Is this an Eve with a second
chance, this time redeeming by giving up the knowledge, by releasing it? To pin
the image down that way is to miss the point, is to turn back to the fruit and
eat it. It is nothing more than itself, a Chinese woman turning away from a
bowl of fruit, “its own sure image.”
Reprinted from L=A=N=G=U=A=G=E, no. 7 (March 1979).
Collected in The
L=A=N=G=U=A=G=E Book, edited by Bruce Andrews and Charles Bernstein
(Carbondale: Southern Illinois
University Press,
1984).